BEDID - Day 9 - You Ask, I Tell Part 2

Got a question or topic you want me to blog? Email me or post it here.

Today, I talk about checking dudes out with my buddies, being less anonymous, and you get a picture of me!

Question from Ethan: 

Do, when you hang out with 'the guys', point out good looking fellows like straight guys would banter 'bout a hot girl? I wonder because I would like to be this open with my mates. 

On occasion, yes. Admittedly, I don’t do it quite as much as say, with a straight female friend, but it still happens. Sometimes I’ll follow through on general comments, like “Gee, there are a lot of hot girls here” with “Yeah, and the guys aren’t too bad either.” In the same vein, a lot of the time I'll make comments when they’re pointing out hot girls to me, so I'll also join in and point out the cute guys in the room. There’s a few times where they’ve actively encouraged me, ie. “So…which guys here are you in to?” or called me out on checking a dude out: “Dude, stop drooling on yourself”. They've also figured out my type, so once in a while they'll also ask me if I like the ass on a particular guy or something like that. Even though it's a little more difficult to make judgement calls on particular parts of a guy's/girl's body since it's not what we're attracted to (ie. It's harder for me to make comments on a girls boobs or for them to make a comment on a guy's package), but we still try and see it from each others perspective.

I figure it’s a two way street, if they’re going to check out girls with me, it’s only fair that I get to point out hot dudes to them too. My suggestion, if you want to have that sort atmosphere with your buddies is just do it...make general comments about dudes first and see how they respond. If they encourage it, go ahead and objectify guys to your heart's content =P

Question from Kevin:   

Ever thought about making this blog (a little) less anonymous, like post some (maybe non face)pics or something? I'm asking because I was in doubt about that for a very long time before deciding to be a little less anonymous (you know, being carefull, overthinking what could happen,...) but I honestly like blogging more now, like I'm able to be more just me, without special watchguard and stuff... 

I had definitely thought about it before, but I had two reservations about doing so. The first was me being self-conscious about my race. As silly as it sounds, I think it's because I'm not attracted to Asian guys, so I automatically assume the same is true for everyone else. In my mind, there wasn't any incentive or point to do so, but in learning to love myself that's one of the things I've had to confront, so I'm letting it go.

More importantly, the second was what my friends would think if they ever saw this blog. I was always a little concerned what they might have thought about me seeing all these self-conscious, sometimes emo, sometimes angry posts. I was also worried that they might be a little annoyed with me writing/talking behind their back. 

I took a risk on my feelings this weekend though, and gave one of my close friends the URL to this blog. They've been gong through their own rough period (which I won't discuss here for their privacy) and we both swapped our own stories, experiences and feelings. It was a lot like how I felt when I came out to Lindsay, being able to express myself that deeply and have someone understand and be sympathetic to what I was saying made me feel as if I could trust them to respond the same way to what I've written here. After they read (most of) the blog, they sent me an email letting me know what they thought, and it was nothing but positive stuff. They liked my writing style and the blog itself because it's so me and were happy to see me open up and be comfortable with who I am. They sort of knew there was a bit more to me than met the eye, and to see these other emotions, this other side of me was refreshing, almost like meeting a family member that was like me, yet different. And they felt privileged for me having trusted them enough to share that with them. I don't know if they're going to keep following my blog or not, but if they see this, thank you, and I'm glad I could share this with you and I hope our relationship goes new places from here.

So, with my two concerns out of the way, I'll slowly open up a bit more to you guys too. And with that, here's a picture of me and one of the Twins crossing a creek on a hike. Note: if someone says there's just a little bit of snow on the trail, don't automatically believe them.