First-First Date

Well, if I wasn't dating before, I definitely am now. Alex, the Vancouver transplant from San Francisco I met on OkCupid messaged me during the week asking to meet up while he was in town this weekend. And, for something different, I decided to go for it.

By all accounts, things should've gone awkwardly. I had a pretty significant anxiety attack this week and wasn't feeling too confident in my sociability, and not having a coffee for a week made me pretty jittery and nervous, as if I wasn't already in preparation for what was an actual date in my mind. But it's amazing what the right person can do. He was really easy to talk to, and despite my nerves, we never really dropped conversation. We seem to share the same values, like closeness with family, friends and dedication to self-improvement. Even where we are in life seems somewhat similar; we're both mostly out to our friends and family and we're looking to enrich our relationships with people. We share a similar outlook on life (cheerful, or at least trying to make it that way) and while initially I didn't think he was my type, in person he was pretty cute. 

One of the things I wasn't used to was being on the receiving end of chivalry. As soon as I arrived at the coffee shop, he offered to buy me a coffee and as soon as I was done that, he offered to get up and get me a mug of hot water. And at the end, just as we were about to depart, he gave my arm a bit of a caress, which I wasn't used to. I guess because normally I'm  the guy to take charge and take care of my friends, it was a little odd to sit back and have this guy wait on me. Not to say it felt awkward, it was actually nice for a change, it just felt...foreign.

Now, I'm not sure where he wants to take this, but he's definitely looking for a boyfriend. In our conversation about our extended families and coming out, he mentioned that he was catching flack from his grandmother for not seeing someone and how at 30, he's really the last one out of his cousins and siblings to not being someone over to family dinners. He seemed pretty hopeful that that trend would end soon. We also talked about moving out and being independent, so I inadvertently asked him if he would ever consider moving back to Vancouver. Even though most of his job prospects are down in California, he would consider coming back for his family, a decent job...and the right guy. Definitely for the right guy. Hmmm. I'm curious to see where he wants to go with this, and whether he would be okay with the glacial pace that I would like to see. In the meantime, I'll keep my options open. 

So overall, a pretty solid first date; and it must've been in his eyes too since he asked me for a second date before he flies back to San Francisco on Monday =)